Life

I tried, but I don't succeed. 

I studied, but I don't get good marks.

I planned, but it don't turn out to be the same as what I hoped it would.

I hoped too much, and I disappoint at the end. 

I gave promises, but I break them.

And I gave so many trouble to people around me. 

Can't my life get any worse?  

Ya Allah, may you always ease my way and give guidance to me. I'm sorry Umi =(  

Future Planning

Assalamualaikum. 

I've been in Uni for nearly two months and I can see many changes in myself. I mean it's not the bad ones, but it's a good change that makes me feel wow! *clap clap*

Well, I'm not a student who's being sponsored by any scholarships or foundations. And I didn't apply for PTPTN. Wait, I applied, and I got it, but the forms are not being sent yet, and I think I'll cancel it cuz Imma waiting for YBR huhu. Plus, PTPTN imposes high interest which will take me forever to pay them back! Therefore, I've to struggle hard to use money wisely. No more shopping, no more buying clothes/bags/accesories thru online. Save, nina save.

So instead of cutting the shopping budget that makes me feel so much stress about it, I'm planning on saving a quarter of money I get from Abi for many good reasons. Plus, i'll get many benefits from it in the long run.

#1 Save, so that I can go to Egypt and attend Adli's convocation day. *rising eyebrows* 

#2 Save, and put the money aside with my daily-used-money. This is for back up to be used after Degree. I'll try not to use it unless if I'm desperate, huhu.  

#3 Save, and start planning the budget for wedding day, woohoo.
Everybody wants to get married, and wants it to be something memorable. Memorable to me is a simple one, but it's unique, style, nice, and the guests can remember. Even a small wedding has already taken RM10k+, what if a wedding to have these four criteria, aite? =/ So, start planning it from now Nina, if you want to make it come true. This is not a plan of menggatal-nak-kahwin-awal, but it's a long run planning. We should start saving our wedding budget from now, so that we can cut on making private loan with the banks in the future. *Ehem ehem, macam mak-mak* 

To study in Batu Pahat is a God's blessing to me. No Forever 21, Cotton On, Padini Store,  where I can shop like there's no other day fiiiuuhh. Imagine what if I were to study in KL that has these stores? In your dream lah, if you wanna save -.- Okay, that's all about my plans on saving money and the purpose of saving it. The main purpose is just to attend Adli's convocation day, hiewhiewhiew ♥ As conclusion, the purpose is decreasing as it goes down =P 

Till here, with love, 

Nina 

Deepavali's Story

Assalamualaikum.

Hello dumb blog and readers! Namaste, mera nam hey Nina. Varuga varuga. (Deepavali's celebration mode -.-) A day without school is a God's bless day, I tell you. Mark that, a God's bless day. It's a full blessed day, y'know, since I don't have to wake up so early to get to the class, I need no having a long stand in front of my locker to pick the clothes I can match with, and and and, I don't have to think twice either to wash a-full-pail-laundry or not before shower (this is the hardest part in every good morning I have). So then, where's the good in the good morning? Huhu.

I was awakened from a message notification, at 0856. A message from Adli, saying that he misses me a lot teehihihihi. After reading his message, I pulled up the blanket to the chest level, and started to go back to my dreamland. 0856, still early. Then came my bestie in UTHM into my room, asking me to accompany her to the Terminal. And I said yes to her request. As today is a holiday, I planned to do revision or finish the final touch assignment. And because of her request, I need to cancel my plan and I thought today would be a day with nothing less but a waste-of-time day. But instead of having a-waste-of-time-day, I learnt much more things that books can never teach me. Thanks Tiara (:

On our way to the terminal, the bus got so packed by immigrants from Bangladesh. Now that the bus is packed, I can't breathe anymore fresh air except their's. You know what their's here refers to, right? As I am feeling annoyed by the smell, I got so much more annoyed with this so called loser Bangla guy. He was trying to act cute in front of me, as he kept hugging over his friend's body and putting his head down to his friend's shoulder. He acted like as if he's a very loving person, and as I looked at his stupid act, I caught him for several times looking at me, it's like an if-I'm-looking-at-him-or-not look. Duhh, clearly shown that he was testing his market in front of me -.- Y'know, the situation you get when someone annoys you so much, but you just can't help letting your eyes from their annoying-ness! I faced this situation earlier and and I AM very that kind of a person, I tell you. The more I get annoyed by something, the more I like to stare at him's/her's. Yea, I know I'm such a loser -.- #1 Lesson I learnt: To take my eyes off to whatever shit that happens.

I wished the guy in the bus was this guy in the picture. Eh, cannot. The guy in the pic never annoy me. Hihi. 

After buying the ticket, we took a bus to Carrefour. As we were on the bus, there was this little boy together with his granny. He didn't stay still and gave a lot of trouble to his granny. The granny was sitting next to the bus alarm, and he can't help on pressing it. He laughed every time he pressed it. And at every time he pressed the button, the granny will slap his hand. There was one time when he wanted to press the alarm, the granny unintentionally (I guess) punched the boy's thigh, and he cried loudly in pain. Pity on him right? He got scolded just because of an alarm. Huhu. #2 Lesson I learnt: Be patient when handling with the small kids as they're just a kid. They just wanna have fun of something. Act nicely, they'll be nice to you too.

We reached Carrefour after 30 minutes. We hunted for food as soon as we reached there and we had KFC for lunch. The food was okay, but the environment around it wasn't. Flies were flying around my table, the staff kept opened-closed the trash can, and she even brought the sweep and threw the rubbish when I was eating. I can relate that the restaurant and the staffs are not hygiene and hygienic person. #3 Lesson I learnt: Never go to KFC Carrefour anymore.

After two hours of window shopping, we headed to the bus stop to wait for the bus. I was sitting next to a two-kids-mommy. She's a nice person. And as the bus moved, an Indian mommy with her two kids entered the bus. It was raining heavily outside. The baby she hold got wet because of the rain. Mark that, the baby. Ayoo minachi, pity on your baby lar. He's just a baby kott. I just can't imagine myself if I am holding a baby of mine and he/she gets wet from the rain. And I definitely won't let my baby to get even a drop of rain! Pitied those who are unfortunate cuz they need to go somewhere by bus, especially when in rain. I'm grateful that I'm being born in a family which provide good shelter and everything else for me. Thank you Allah. Alhamdulillah. #4 Lesson I learnt: I want to study hard and work hard to earn amount of money, so that my kids will be totally comfortable and have a good perfect life.

Work hard till I can have this house and car (: 

Moral of the story: Life is full of people with different attitude and way of life. Sometimes we need to put ourselves in their condition, so that we would be grateful and learn the true meaning of life. Be grateful of what you achieved now and work hard for it. Thank you Allah for everything you've given to me. Guide me all the way, so that I won't go over the boundary. Amin.

With love, 

Nina

Harsh.

Assalamualaikum.

Life treats me harshly these days. I got so many things running in mind, and they are about the choices I need to choose in my life, eg. #1 To study or to be in standby mode just in case if he goes online. And I chose to go online so that I can keep in touch with him. But it turned out to be the opposite of what I thought it was. Sigh. #2 To hardly choose not to play softball. Well, I'm a University student now, and I should actively involve in Koku so that it would ease me to find a job in the future. There was a softball selection recently to represent the U in MASUM. I missed the chance I had without giving it a try. Double sigh. #3 To keep those feelings I have in mind alone, or to find someone whom I can trust to lend me their ears. This is the hardest part after all. Triple sigh.

Is it me the only one who feels this way? Hey you, are you doing good if you're in the same shoes? And if you're not, why is it me the only one who feels this way? How can you not feel the same thing like I have now? Sigh. Is it me the only one to be blamed or is it me the only one who should carry all the burdens and to put as much efforts as I can so that we can still keep what we have now? Can you be with me and set things right together? Can you or can you not? I'm just sick of all these things and the decisions I have to make. I'm just sick. But after all the sickness I feel, I just can't let you out of my mind or to not to think about you, not even a second. How's that? Should I ignore you and pretend that I'm okay or should I just say it to you so that you can know the very true feelings I have now? Long sigh.

Oh Allah, please lend me some strength to handle this and please be with me all the time. Even if he's not with me, I know you'd never leave Your Servant alone. I believe if you bring me to this, you will show me the way. Please show me. Amin. Till here.

With love, 

Nina  

The New Me.

Assalamualaikum.

Hye, this is my very first post in this blog. Actually I used to have one before, but I deleted it because of some relevant reasons which I need to take in consider. #1 I felt inconvenient with my followers/readers. I know it was my fault to let the link appeared publicly till they can know the existence of the blog or become my followers. Because of the inconvenient I felt, I need to think twice before I can publish a post up. #2 Some of the posts are not supposed to be written out in the first place by me, and be read by other people whom don't have any connections to do with me. In other words, they should be kept for personal view only, or for people whom I trusted or the loved ones a.k.a Adli. #3 My new friends were one of my follower. This is quite similar to the first reason above, but I deliberately choose to separate them. #4 The previous blog contained too many euw-gelifying-posts. Mark the word too many. I think I need to erase them all, but when I give a second thought about it, I found out that I'll be having no more posts in my blog! And so, instead of deleting the euw-gelifying-posts, I deleted the whole blog. Haha -.- 

My official blog: neena-a.blogspot.com

The a with the dash symbolizes Adli. I want my things/stuffs to have his name too ehem ehem. I shall be active to blogging, or else there's nothing to be remembered. Till here.

With love, 

Nina